Humanity in the hands of white god

When I was a child we thought God was White.
We spoke of it often and the conclusion was always that God was no colour.
We had to make Him colourless if we were to pursue Him – if we too must be blessed, rich or have anything good.
He had to be colourless because if He were White the reasons we suffered under White rule would make sense and we would be hopeless.
If He were White our surfering would endure forever.
We said that but we still believed He had to be White.
He was because if He were not, then we would not suffer.
Has He not blessed them and cursed us?
I had to believe He was colourless and that we had missed something.
Why we hungered? Why we were cornered? Why our land was now taken?
Why our money was so little? Why we did not have this and why they had that?
God must be White.
I believed against hope that He is not.
If He is not then He will hear me.
As an older child I saw things change.
I saw a black old man rise. I saw crowds lift their fits as they saw him. I saw black hands. Then I saw white fists slowly but surely raising their fists too as though in worship of this old black man. This old black man.
God is not White?
Were we right?
Others began to suffer less, others prospered, others being non-white but then the rest of the continent still suffered.
This dark skin still suffered in every country of this continent.
I wondered had we not prayed enough, how much must we do till He hears us.
Aids came and they called us immoral, promiscuous and every name under heaven, forgetting that they gave us Aids the minute they landed and violeted us killing our spirits so that we would not taste freedom even when it was given us.
There you have it more evidence, even when you are meant to be blessed you are cursed.
It hit me again. Was He really White?
Then one day He opened my eyes.
Colour is not His primary thing, humanity is shallow.
Then I realised that long before anyone came from any continent, long before anyone took anybody’s land. Long before anyone raped anyone and enslaved them in their own backyard, we had everything we needed but we gave it all away.
We thought we were waiting for Him but He was always waiting for us.
He had given us too much power already and would not disempower us by medling. He wanted us to rise. He believed in us. He wanted us to rise not against White power or any colour power but against darkness that distroys humanity in one form or another.
We had to rise; not He.
Until we got that we were powerless, sitting and waiting. Until we knew our power in Him, until we took up our weapons given to us long before but we had forgotten how.
The key that was lost in Eden was a key for our rule not over each other. He waited for us to find our key again.
He waits for us to rise to take up our weapons and distroy the enemies of the soul. The enemy that fights against humanity will not come from heaven because heaven already came down to give the power back to us.
However it was the day that Obama became the president of America that I knew without a doubt that God never was White.
He waits for time. He waits for us to come to know the power we have been given.

(c) siki dlanga

OPEN LETTER TO PRESIDENT JACOB ZUMA

Honourable President of the Republic of the most beautiful land and the most beautiful people of South Africa:

Honourable President Jacob Zuma the recent reports about your love child have not been honourable, however this is not how I wish to begin my letter to you sir. Please forgive my poor vocabulary it is an easy give away that I am in no way a member of any youth league.

I love South Africa with all my heart. I love our diversity. I love who we are, what we have become and what we are destined to become. I also know that Mr. Jacob Zuma that you would not be sitting in office at this moment had you not loved this land with a deep passion yourself. I see you Mr. President as a man who has a gift to overcome, you are a victor, victories not all of us approve of but none-the-less you have that gift in you. You are a reconciler and that I truly admire about you. Our country can grow in unique ways under your leadership if you will rise up to it. I love the manner, in which you embrace the poor of our country, when I look at you I can see why they would believe that you are their champion. I did not vote for you mainly because of your links to corruption and your relations with women that are unsettling to me as a woman and as a citizen of this beautiful land. I do not take for granted all that you have sacrificed to serve the people of this land and believe me Mr. President I pray for you, many people I know pray that you would become a successful president of the republic of South Africa.

The reason I am writing this letter to you Mr. Jacob Zuma is thus in no means to tear you down, I believe you are so much more than what you are giving us right now. I have been extremely angered by the recent news of your baby with Dr. Khoza’s daughter. I am hurt, disturbed and have nearly cried because having not voted for you Mr. President I chose to withhold judgment from you and I wrote to many of my friends to do the same so that you can lead without those nagging voices that tell you what you have done wrong in the past before you even make your first move as president. I wiped the slate clean and I decided that I would support you and encouraged many to do so. These recent news sir have hurt those efforts immensely. The best way I can describe is that I felt betrayed as a citizen of South Africa by your actions. If this is a personal matter as many of the members of the ANC claim then tell me Mr. President then why is the nation hurting and in an uproar about your actions. I wish that for once, just for once that the leaders of this nation would lead without shifting blame the whole time. This nation would fly if we can just get that one thing right.

To add to this Mr. President many of my friends and myself work with the youth of this nation and in many instances the youth of Africa we encourage them to live upright lives. We are devastated by the impact of HIV/AIDs has on our youth and we want to do whatever is within our means to reverse this and the best way we know how is to mentor well, live by example and give our young people life skills that will empower them to teach others and live full lives that are free of AIDs. I am afraid to say this to you Mr. President but your behavior up till now is unsupportive of our efforts and the worst fear is that the youth will look at your behavior and see how the ANCYL justifies your behavior and die in the hands of yours and their deception.
Mr. President when I first heard this I was too shocked and too hurt to respond. The next moment I thought you Mr. President are not fit to govern our land as the one thing that is destroying our land is sexual promiscuity which has landed us in this mess in the first place. I refuse to be diplomatic about this fact. It is the truth as even those who have been raped have been defiled by those who live like that. President Mbeki was recalled as the President of this land for reasons which are still unbeknown to me; I am certain there is no reason that such can not be done to you as well, for reasons that are known by the whole country. I also thought that if you love our country truly and truly know that we cannot be seen as a nation that does not care about HIV/AIDS then Mr. Jacob Zuma you will step down to demonstrate that.

One more thing Mr. President the press has every reason to make a big deal about this as the responsible thing to do would have been for you to announce these news to the nation yourself. If you had any remorse before the press came any where near it by now Mr. President you should have been brilliant at handling such matters by now. Your not having come out with this yourself shows that you wanted to sweep this under the carpet which is even more concerning than the original offense.

I write this letter in full respect of your office and your role in our country. If you still think that you are fit to govern us Mr. Zuma then we deserve much better than this. I believe we can be much better and you have no reason not to be much better than this. Isn’t our country all about becoming our best selves out-doing what is expected not going even below the bare minimum. If you believe that you are fit to govern then we need you to inspire that greatness in us and not our worst sir.

I write this in my own capacity as the youth of South Africa and I have support from other young people in South Africa to write this letter to you. I do not belong to any political party and have no such ambitions. I am however fully interested in taking responsibility for our country and ensure that I do so in service to God and the country in the capacity I believe I have been blessed with.

Yours for the good of South Africa
Siki Dlanga
Written in my own capacity

Please note that none of the views expressed here are meant to be prideful or arrogant in anyway but in a genuine concern for the president, the nation and mainly the implications these recent developments can have on the youth. I am humbled and honoured that you are an approachable president that will consider this letter from an ordinary citizen.

a story of a cellphone can reflect a story about one's life itself!

So I did it. I have officially married the new Mr. MTN. He paid my lobola with a phone I could not open fast enough. Well, please don’t tell everyone that I paid for my own lobola that is a disgrace but this is how it is.

Ok, let me start the story from the top. I have been looking for a new phone for almost 2 years now.

The first 6 months was the last 6 months of my contract with Mr. Vodacom and we were going to take the matter further but no perfect phone presented itself.

So, I kept waiting and watching for the perfect shape, perfect features, perfect price, perfect as decided by me. Once in Vodacom when I expressed these desires and then they asked me to present my then current phone and the man uglily (allow me to form this word) and insensitively jeered at the fact that I even thought anything was wonderful about the one I had that I would even wait and weigh any future phones. That hurt me but I persevered with Vodacom till the final story of his unkindness towards me which included stripping off the numbers I loved. Change was then forced. This was practically being kicked out of the house and he changed the locks. Yellow glory awaited me. I came from blue how could I trust this yellow? I should have seen the colour as a good sign because I love the colour anyway. So I sort of fearfully looked at MTN direction. I then went to further discuss options of taking the relationship further with their phone deals. My sister waited in the wings for my other phone until she got herself another one because no phone would please me. She gave up.

My younger brother also attempted to solve my cell-phone problem for months until he also gave up. Almost 2 years later on Saturday, I thought my eyes finally found rest on this one phone only to find that it is missing one important thing – a better camera. So Mr. MTN shows me another one. He does not know that my dilemma hardly has all to do with function but function is as important as form perhaps a little less important. Function is wonderful but form must be just right. This is not a reflection on how I pick the perfect gentleman. Sort of but not quite. His function must be glorious enough to make his form look like a mere shadow even though the form is dearly acceptable if it is glorious. I have owned very few cell-phones in my life.

If one measured commitment according to that, then I think that I would pass for one who has very high commitment levels. I don’t get rid of you as soon as there’s something that sparkles more than you. My cell phone searches kind of reminds me of how my older brother picks a girl from the thousands who are already interested. He waits, weighs, thinks of every angle for what seems to be forever and we pray but clearly not nearly enough yet. But now I think we have added on the list somethings like ‘will she cope with the family?’ No. Not that kind of coping. Back to my phone. When I lost my phone 3 years ago I waited for 3 months and lived without a phone for that period. A phone is personal so here I do not apply my recycling methods. I also rejected all wonderful offers. I am sure you can’t believe that. I apply different rules to different things. I had to find one with my name written on it at first glance. I believe in love a first sight. If I like you at first sight I will like you forever. I am yet to be wrong. It has nothing to do with what one does but what my spirit tells me. So one glance at Sony Ericson and it sang my name. I owned it for 3 full years and struggled to find something I would feel the same way about.An i-phone is for stars and people who like things.

I would have liked it but its not enough. It’s not about the money and the glam. So I thought well something sort of similar in an affordable price range but it’s got to be right. Well, I went to Mr. Yellow on Sunday. The matter was settled in a few minutes with no endless paperwork. Little money involved and there it was. I asked if I could open it. He said sure. I did everything I could to compose myself. I managed. My hands could not be steady, I could not open the box fast enough.

Mr. Yellow looks at my hands then looks my face, he looks at the box again and as though he were seeing something far more to be happening here than his usual cellphone sales, he was compelled to say: “Oh, just let me open it for you. It’s like you’re opening a Christmas present!” he exclaims. I realise that I have been found out. After all, what woman opens her own engagement box and puts it on her own finger? It was Mr. Mtn's job to do this. He opened it and said: "take it". I grab the phone and it is marvelous to touch and  to behold. I exclaim: “Dude Yes! Do you know how long I have waited for the perfect phone and now to find it! To own it!” More points for Mr. Yellow Mtn as he says: “Can I see what did you had before?”

I whip my old one out and he responds sincerely impressed: “O yes, that was a really nice phone.” Mr. Blue in Vodacom had looked at it coldly and jeered that I had thought any good thing of my Sony. Mr. Yellow said it was great even though he had just slipped the sparkling more wonderful new ring on my finger. It’s not the most expensive phone on the market, no sir, no ma’m but it is the loveliest and most elegant phone I am yet to own. The ladies love it. The boys at work got their hands on it and they love it. They want one even though one just got a brand new phone 2 weeks ago. It is the new Nokia XpressMusic. Needless to say my boss has just walked in to come and see this phone the boys are talking about.

All I can say is thank you Lord :) Ask and it shall be given you. Seek and you shall find. Knock and the door shall be opened. If God knows the number of hairs on our heads He sure can knows what fragrance perfumes we would most delight in or even cell-phones. He names every star. He counts your hair. He knows our full days. I didn't pray all the way to the cell-phone shop but God knows our thoughts before we even think them. He knows our past, present and future (Psalm139). The number of our days are in His books already. God knows every detail, the mundane, the important, the frustrations, the things that cause our hearts to thrill and He wants all of us – not just what we think He should know. He is either Lord of all or not Lord at all. He is Lord over this cell-phone too.

Much love SeekYe first the kingdom of God – not cell-phones and other things 1st and then those things will be added unto you…

Gotta go – I have some God seeking to do. Siki! Peace and love to you!

Rom 11:33-36

O the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgments, and His ways past finding out! For who hath known the mind of the Lord? or who hath been his counselor? Or who hath first given to him, and it shall be recompensed unto him again? For of him, and through him, and to him, are all things: to whom be glory forever. 

Amen

The greatest love gift

O the beauty of the grace God has lavished upon us! Grace is surely the most profound of all love gifts. It is the expression of the highest, deepest, widest love imaginable. Grace must be the highest form of the divine expression of His goodness towards us. If we miss this we miss everything that embodies Him. If we do not see this love we will not know His love, we will not appreciate it, we will not receive it and we will doubt His unquestionable goodness to us. God's grace is the ultimate window from which to see the truth. If it is not this window then all humanity is lost in darkness with no perception of this liberating truth that breaks every human bondage.

Grace tears the curtain that disqualified us from glory. Grace qualifies us for God's unattainable standards of glory. No king is worthy for this, no queen or prince nor priest of any kind but the miracle of the virgin birth of the Son of Man with incorruptible seed.

to be cont.

Losing what is not lost

It’s simple.

Treat it like a death.

She told me that.

Has she ever experienced a death?

I asked.

Yes.

She repeated.

Treat it like a death.

I understood what she meant.

I equally did not.

How can you treat the living that way.

Not just any living

But the living you love so desperately.

She was telling me to die.

Telling me to hate myself.

She is right.

But when do you begin to live?

Is there a time to wait for?
When do you know?

Is this the only way I can live.

To die?

reasons to love you

How many ways do you love me?
More than the number of my precious many hair strands.
As copious as the number of the stars floating in the many galaxies.
How precious is your love for me?
As prized as the weight of all the gold in all the mines found,

How costly is your dedication to me?
All the earth’s jewels were not enough to purchase my engagement ring to you,
All the angels in heaven put together were not enough to prove your might to me,
So you purchased me with your own death so that I might never die.
Never.
So that I should live with you forever.
Forever.

How much do I long for thee?
As a deer pants for water in a desert,
As a barren woman for a babe,
As an unrequited woman for love,
As a prisoner for freedom,
As a poor man for an inheritance,
As for a dying man longs for the next breath
So I long for you
Jesus


(c) Siki Dlanga

SA 22 April 2009 Elections and my creative spiritual experience

There was an unusual sacredness to the day yesterday. There was a silence not even Sunday carries. There was a reverence and a cleanliness in the air as if Someone purified the atmosphere for this sanctified moment as South Africa voted. It is as if everything waited with her, for her because she is worth it. Even business could wait.

Foreigners were scarce as if giving South Africans the space to be to make their mark. We stood together for hours in what seemed like a rare opportunity.The night before, my body was brimming with energy. I could hear a beat and my body begged me to respond. The African drum drummed in the ears of my soul until I burst forth in an African dance my body had hid for so long. Thankfully I was alone in our spacious rented house. The song was like a prayer. But not any prayer, a happy prayer. The drum beat spoke of a time that has come. A time for change.

I have never been so excited for an election than this one before.Gilly comes to collect me so that we can join others to pray. We pray into various aspects of the country and for the politicians to be able to fulfill what they have promised.

We first spent about 10 minutes thanking God for our politicians. I thanked God for Zille’s zeal, Zuma’s charisma and charm, COPE’s courageous leaders and Holomisa among others. I thanked God for Malema too. I just cannot recall what I thanked God for but I wanted to thank God for Malema’s humour but I did not come out with it as others were listening and awaiting a serious prayer so I said something. I just cannot recall what.I went back home. I sang over Africa and South Africa and felt God’s intense love and joy over this country curse through my body.

I felt an unusual peace midnight.

I felt an absence of evil in the air because Saints everywhere had been praying. In that hour I knew the winner very well. I knew it was God’s choice, I accepted it hence my response surprises me today. I felt a hope for this country like I can not describe. I felt God’s favour shining on this country. I heard His song – I felt us beckoned to come out and play because we are now safe to do so. I saw a brilliant new day for us.What a day the 22nd of April 2009 was for the South African. It was a day set apart. We the people voted. We. Us.I arrived home so exhausted because so much of my energy had been spent praying. I never slept much then I woke up and queued. I came back and I slept for a while.

Then. That drum began playing again. It called for change again. I heard it until my body prayed in dance. Again I had the fortune of being alone. Lest my brother and my housemate think surely other spirits have come upon me.If there was such a thing as a Christ inspired witchdoctor - I discovered one.

The name sangoma probably means something like we-sing rather than the English version of witch doctor. It is probably “the one who sings and calls the spirits”. That is the closest interpretation to the word sangoma. Well, I sang and called up not the spirits of the dead – God forbid. I sang and danced and called up the Spirit of the living God to blow in all the corners of the country and my body danced in a prophetic dance I have not experienced it before not like this.A new way of praying was born, in prophetic African dance and declaring a prophetic song.My hands burning with God’s presence, as if set ablaze.

I prounced around as if I knew what I was doing – there was a lioness in me that was bellowing that was declaring the things of God as if I were a prophetess of some sort. Something like that sangoma – the one who stirs up the Spirit of God.I know that change has come in South Africa.

God is with us even in a way we too do not quite understand yet. Creativity will explode in ways we never quite imagined. God is with us. Change has come in a different form in an unusual suspect of a president who incidentally sings and dances. He has danced his way to victory. A victory we hoped would not come. We hoped he would be jailed but he would not be stopped. He sang and danced and the gates would not be shut.What is this we find ourselves in? All I know is that there is no doubt in my heart and mind that change is here even if we did not vote for the form in which it has come.